Smoking

I aimed to go to bed early tonight. But couldn’t sleep. Wanted to but just couldn’t. Air is not enough. Thoughts all over me. Well, then this brilliant idea pooped into my mind – have a smoke. Have it right here, right now. Thanks god it’s a hotel room. A hotel bed. Do whatever you want. Fuck the job you don’t really want. Smoke laying in the bed just like those crazy nights you had once staying with the guy you didn’t really know for the whole week. Imagine someone that close and loving is by your side right now.
Opened the windows wide, grabbed the laptop, music all into me – good old fellow Dave singing just for me – all the best for twenty or so years. Nice smell of the cigarette squeezed between my fingers.
It’s something you do to socialize. But can’t do it in front of the others. It’s only sometimes when you are comfortable with other person which is rare if you understand what i mean.
And tonight – it’s a way to socialize with myself – hey-come on, let’s see where we are and what we’re gonna do next!
Second one. Feeling so cool. Wonder why is it. Is it a new inflow of the spring optimism in your veins, infection obtained rather fast in this totally foreign city of the south? Wow – at last – if it is. Hi there – I’ve been longing for you so much!

12 Feb 2009
22.54, Moscow timeline